Sober January is a disaster.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
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