Well douche your snatch and let's go!
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
Randomize