awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
