so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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