goodnight i made you a song goodbye
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
Randomize
