Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
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