i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize
