Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Randomize
