Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
He asked to "fluff my boner.."
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
Randomize