I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
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He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
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I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
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