Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
Randomize