for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
Randomize