I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize
