worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
Randomize
