I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
Randomize
