Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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