you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
Randomize
