Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
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