come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize
