AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Randomize
