You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize
