I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
MIDGETS
????
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize