his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
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