awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
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