So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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