Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
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