so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
you were so drunk you tried to use the microwave as a calculator for your BAC
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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