Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
Randomize
