doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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