Midget sex pt 2 tonight
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
Randomize
