We named our party play list daddy issues
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
