i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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