Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
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