It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
false alarm, still single
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
Randomize
