I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
You need to stop texting me at SEVEN in the morning. It wakes my one night stands up and makes for the awkward talk way too early.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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