i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
