Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
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