shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
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