:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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