O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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