i just had sex bonerless
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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