This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Randomize
