Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
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