How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
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