Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
Randomize
