if you like me you must not know who I am
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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