i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
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