I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
Randomize
