no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
Randomize