she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
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