i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
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